We hear this “Christianize” phrase often if that’s what you want to call it but, its a pretty solid question. Most believers say it, we declare it in songs…”Jesus your all we need”, “Less of me more of you”, “Christ is enough for me”. Now lets be honest how many of us actually believe that and live by that? Well that’s exactly what the Lord has been teaching me this week or should I say challenging me with that question. Asking ” Nana am I truly enough for you”? Hmmm I love this picture honestly I imagine that’s how I look like with Jesus about half the time, Lord help me lol.
I’m so gratefully that He is so patience, tender and gentle with me even when I pout when his will doesn’t match up with my desires. You see this past week I found myself falling into anxiousness again bewildered about what the Lord was and is doing in my life. He finally spoke to me about a job He wanted me to apply for. Finally, I thought after 6 months of unemployment with it ending today I just knew that I would apply and would get a quick response, interview and of course the job. But, no I haven’t heard anything back from them, hence the anxious thoughts began then follows the doubt. I found myself looking at my situation and being discouraged this morning. I started thinking about my lack of provision, what I was going to do, with No job, no car and if I can be honest no husband lol. Yes, I started thinking about all of it like Lord when, Lord when. I realized I had based my joy and all my emotions based on my circumstances and what I didn’t or did have rather than Jesus. How often as believers do we do that, yet we say Jesus your are enough.
If you find completion, contentment or joy in anythings else than Jesus, He then is in fact not enough
I had the most amazing experience a few days prior where i felt power and electricity shoot through my whole body. The feeling was so amazing it took my breath away literally, then immediately after breathing in I felt like a gush of warmth, felt like Gods love and goodness wash over me. It was enough to make me melt lol Seriously, I felt as if Jesus had held his breath and blew on me, it was soooo wonderful and in that very moment. I knew why David said this one thing I inquire of and seek is to dwell in the presence of the Lord for all the days of my life. For David, Jesus became enough! He had all of Israel , all the riches and as many concubines he could have but for King David that wasn’t enough all he wanted was Gods presence. In that very moment I realized that’s all I wanted, that’s all we were created to desire is Gods presence. I found myself in my prayer closet thinking If I had a husband in my bed, children running around, a nice vehicle outside, my dream job and amazing ministry that would honestly be NOTHING compared to Gods presence. Most importantly it would mean NOTHING without Jesus. At that very moment I didn’t care for anything else in the world but my sweet Jesus and to be in his presence for all the days of my life. I just wanted more of him and to know him more that’s it.
I am coming to you now, but I say these things while I am still in the world, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within them.
However, night I went to bed anxious, I felt the anxiety on my back and neck. I even had a horrible restless night. I woke up feeling discouraged, tired and weary and during my alone time this morning I felt Jesus speaking to me tenderly “Nana I am here” ,”Nana I am right here” I could feel his presence so strongly. Reminding me again, am I enough for you Nana because I am right here with you. Concentrate on my sweet presence with you in every moment and let everything else go” I began to realize how easy it is to forget Jesus’s presence, to forget that he is literally with us, living with us, walking with us doing life with us. How it hurts him when we confess that he is enough yet we walk discouragement or even discontentment when we don’t get what we want and at the time we want it. When we want more things, more love, more validation, more , more. When we have the living God walking with us abounding in his love and grace to us all yet He is not enough. So is Jesus truly enough, Are we willing to abandon ourselves to his will, whatever that may look like? I had to ask myself If that job never came, or vehicle, or family would he be enough…..and He would. We have been studying John in our bible study group and reading this passage touched my heart. A beautiful prayer Jesus prayed for all believers when he was here still in the world. He asked the father that we may have the full measure of HIS joy within us. Isn’t that amazing and that its available to us all. So that was my prayer this morning and for you if you can relate to this blog:
Jesus forgive me for putting selfish desires, selfish ambitions and things before you. Forgive me for finding contentment based on my circumstances rather than what was done for me by your sacrifice on the cross. I pray Lord that I would abandon myself to your perfect will, that I would become nothing and you would become everything in me and through me. Humble me Lord, I pray that I would lay die my life and worldly passions. Deliver me from the opinions of others . I pray that I would have the full measure of your Joy Jesus within me and I would find contentment and joy in you alone. May the one thing I seek and inquire of is to dwell in your presence for all the days of my life. May you be enough for Jesus name. Amen!